I’m not a big fan of Mother’s day celebrations, the reason being, I’ve never got much love from my mother despite longing for it so very much. Hence, I never felt excited or happy reflecting on my relationship with my mother, on this day or any other day. We didn’t share anything special or magical or motherly enough worth talking about.
I’m writing this post today because I decided to be thankful this Mother’s day for what I do have, my mother-in-law, the one that comes closest to one’s own mother. It’s only over the last two years that we’ve actually bonded, thanks to my kids. I’m blessed to say I have a wonderful woman as my mother-in-law. I’ve heard so many stories of women being harassed by their MIL after marriage. But my case is completely different. My MIL is so chilled out, so patient and so level-headed that she amazes me. I’m truly blessed to have her in my life.
She has more concern over me and my well being than what my biological mother has ever had. I guess it all boils down to who raised them and how. My MIL’s mother, Naomi was another sweet woman. I’ve heard so many stories about her from my MIL and I couldn’t help feel a bit unfortunate to have not met her in person. My MIL’s entire family is sweet and decent. They were raised that way. My MIL’s mom was the go to person in her locality, in Nagercoil for all issues that people faced because Naomi paati would have a fair solution to all of them and was very trustworthy. She was highly respected in her community. She is what one could call a virtuous woman. She attended to the needs of her children, trained them to be hard working and proactive, and served her community at the same time.
Last June, I got a chance to meet a lot of my MIL’s relatives when we went for my husband’s cousin’s daughter’s wedding. It was a very pleasant experience. It was nice to know my husband’s side of the family, and I felt it was my responsibility as a parent to keep my kids connected with both sides of the family, paternal and maternal.
I never understood the relationship between kids and their grandparents until I watched up close the strong bond my MIL shared with my kids. My kids can’t live without her. Not even for a day. My son is entirely dependent on her. The first thing he does in the morning as soon as he wakes up is go look for her. She takes great care of my kids. She’s the only reason I can confidently walk out of my home because I know my kids are in safe hands.
My MIL is also a wonderful cook, and a lot of the stuff I make at home has been taught to me by her. She has a wealth of information when it comes to cooking. We’ve always enjoyed her cooking when we visited Chennai. We still love her cooking, but she can’t do much as she’s getting older and weaker.
My MIL is also very brave. Something I truly admire in her. I wish I had her confidence. She’s not easily anxious or agitated and tries to take practical steps towards resolving issues, whether it’s with the kids or otherwise.
Not everyone is as lucky as me to have a best friend in a mother-in-law. Ever since she started staying with us to help with our kids, we’ve spent at least half an hour talking daily over the phone on days we’ve stayed away. I can share anything with her, and though we don’t see eye to eye on everything, we’ve agreed to disagree. We have an amicable relationship, which makes my life a breeze.
Above all else, I treasure the relationship my children share with my MIL. It’s just too precious! I remember days when I’ve cried because my kids didn’t get grandparents’ love or bonding. Well, God’s making up for that now. May all our relationships grow stronger and deeper. Happy Mother’s Day to my Mom, aka MIL. I love you and praise God for bringing you into my life! Thank you for all that you do for our family. We will always be indebted to you. I wish all the women in the world had MILs like you.