It doesn’t happen very often! Being a SAHM is a highly frustrating venture. One in which at times you feel you have lost yourself fully before discovering yourself all over again in a new avatar. It’s not for the feeble hearted.
How many times have I wanted to go back to work, restart my career, have a life of my own? Countless times! But what stopped me? The very thought, ” Who’d take care of my baby, the way I would? And this one thought has stopped me from quitting my SAHM role. I’ve had plenty of domestic helpers come and go with no personal satisfaction towards their behaviour or their work. At one stage, even my young kids asked me to stop hiring them further.
I think we SAHMs don’t give ourselves enough credit. What we’re doing is nothing short of incredible. How many women, who have the financial means to survive, would actually leave their jobs and opt to stay at home to look after their families? Hardly 10% of them. One needs a deeper passion to cater to the physical, mental and emotional needs and well-being of the upcoming generation, to take a step forward in the said direction. It’s not easy.
We, the women of this generation have tasted both worlds. One where we have gained an identity by working, earning, being appreciated and feeling equal to our male peers. Also, the other world, where our identity slowly fades into a mist, where we are hardly recognized or appreciated and life rolls into a monotonous routine of selfless service. Now which woman would want to live in the second world after experiencing the joys of the first one? No woman would!
So recently last week my eldest was lying down with me and she suddenly blurted, “I’m so lucky to have you and dad as my mom and dad. You guys spend so much time with me, my friend says she’s sad because her parents hardly spend time with her.” Suddenly, something that felt like a mundane everyday routine became a unique bond building activity we did on a daily basis. How happy and motivated I felt at that point, I cannot explain. I finally felt it was all worth it, all the sacrifices I’ve made to be with my kids, whether they were financial or mental. I mean what’s more precious in this world, than your child running into your arms and telling you that they’re so glad you’re their parent. Folks are not wrong when they say one day it will be the little things that matter the most. They seem trivial and insignificant but they’re the building blocks of an eternal bond.
As much as possible, I will try to be available for the kids at every stage of their life. At some point in time, I may have to think of working again, but if at any point I feel my work interferes with the welfare of my children, then I wouldn’t think twice about getting back to being a SAHM.
It hasn’t been an easy journey so far. There have been a billion hiccups along the way. At times, I’ve even lost my health simply handling their menace. I’d be lying if I said I’m having a happy time. I’d be more honest if I said it’s a satisfying undertaking. Kudos to all the SAHMs who are raising tomorrow’s heroes in today’s world. Though we don’t see the fruit of our labour today, we will eventually when the right time comes.